Episode 109: Your Money Story with Jen Hemphill
We very, very rarely do interview-type shows on the podcast, but we both wanted to share some additional insight on the topic of money and getting your shit handled.
You’ve heard us both wax poetically about how important it is to deal with your money — not just in your business but also in your personal life.
If, after last week’s episode on foundations, you found yourself wondering just a bit more about the “manage your money” step, this episode is for you. Our guest Jen Hemphill is a money coach and the author of the book Her Money Matters.
Now, y’all know we don’t have guests usually, but we’ve both been listeners of Jen’s podcast, and after reading her book, we wanted to have her on the show as she provides a grounded, practical approach to the sometimes fluffy or elusive concept of the money mindset.
In our conversation, we don’t talk about the tactics of managing money — that’s the “easy” part — but we dig into mindset, money stories, and how to work past the deeply ingrained things about money that we learn early in life.
What is a money story?
- A money story is just the belief that you have about money based on your experiences and observations that really shape our mindset on money and how we treat money.
- There are actually three money stories: the past money story, the present money story, and the future money story.
- It’s important to know that there are three is because we grow up around money a certain way; we see things, hear things, experience things, and our upbringings are all different.
- Past: It’s also important to reflect and to know your past money story is because it’s really easy to repeat the cycle.
- Present: The present money story is looking at how you feel about money and how you’re living life and comparing it to your past money story to see if any of those cycles are being repeated, proved…what’s going on?
- Future: With your future money story, it’s about how do you see yourself living, but not only that, how do you want to feel around money? Excited? You want to have that confidence that each time you go shopping, you hand over that card with ease instead of just cringing wondering if there’s enough money or if it’s going to be rejected. You want to project — and really envision — how you want your life to be and how you want to feel around money.
- When we think about these money stories, what’s critical is writing it down. Not just reflecting on it in your mind, but putting pen to paper. When you start writing you’ll gain a lot more clarity — then the magic happens.
How does our money story impact our business?
- Start with your past money story, write down what you saw and experienced.
- How it limits us in business is that we need to know what served us in the past and what didn’t.
- If we don’t know, we’re going to be repeating some cycles that may not serve us and get stuck.
- We may be doing great in business, we may be bringing in great revenue, and having great success — dollars-wise — but we may not feel fulfilled, or maybe we’re making some rash money decisions instead of investing in things that serve us.
- That has to do with that past money story — knowing what it is, if it serves you, and if it doesn’t, make the decision to change it.
- And really how you change that is by writing how you want to feel about money, making sure you catch those thoughts so you and change them.
What are some common money stories as business owners?
- A common money story — especially as women business owners — is that we don’t deserve it.
- We think “Who am I to charge more money?”
- We tend to have that heart to sympathize and empathize.
What are some actionable tips people can take in terms of changing their story or writing a new one?
- Write down your stories.
- Have a cheat sheet of reframing thoughts. Charge what you’re worth -> “I value myself and I know I can bring that value to that person.” Challenge yourself!
- Throughout the week, catch the catches. If you have a thought (I can’t afford this; I don’t know if I should charge this), take a moment, and call yourself out on that.
- Take a moment to read your stories.
- When you need financial confidence, keep track of your money wins on a separate sheet — big and small.
What do you wish we’d know about our money and our money story, and how we can do better?
- Having that clarity and understanding your money stories and getting clear on your finances
- Business owners tend to think: we make the money and that solves our problems. No, it’s not just about making the money!
- It’s about understanding what the money is going to do and what you want to do with it versus “I’ll just make more money and I’m good.”
Here are our biggest takeaways from working on our own money stories.
- Dealing with my money story over the past four or five years has been a big part of me being able to make more money in my business, get clear on my goals, and get my personal finances handled.
- My money story had me in a scarcity mindset — and saying things like “we can’t afford it” — or feeling resentful about money.
- Getting right with my money story in the way Jen shared has been a game changer. But just know that the work never stops. I’m over the “we can’t afford it,” but I still have my hang-ups.
- I agree wholeheartedly with everything Maggie said, and I have similar stories, though I’d say a lot of my work around money is changing the language and attitude around “this is too expensive” to “this is not a priority” and “I can’t afford that” to “I’ll choose to spend my money on X instead of Y.”
- Always always ALWAYS a work in progress and a constant evolution which is why I love reading money books as it’s a good way to keep the work top of mind. And Jen’s book definitely delivers here — so check it out on Amazon or wherever books are sold. It gets a big thumbs up from both M and me.